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Tuesday, June 5, 2012

The 5 Dating Non-Negotiables: What Are Yours?

My 5 Dating Non-Negotiables 
(Creation of list inspired by Patti Stanger of Millionaire Matchmaker on Bravo--Click here for more information.)

High Integrity--Someone who know what their values are and lives up to them.  Trust is huge for me and reciprocal trust is very important for a healthy relationship.

Family-Oriented--I have 5 siblings and my parents are still married.  I'm not saying the person has to have parents who are still together, but if you are not close with your family, how can I expect you to want to be close with a family of your own?  Or become close with my family?  You don't have to be best friends, but it certainly makes life a lot easier if you are friendly with one another.

Ambitious/Confident--I am a very driven woman.  I need to be with someone who isn't just a dreamer, but also a go-getter.  That type of person keeps me wanting to challenge myself.  Confidence is important in achieving your goals.  I also added confidence because insecurity is an extreme turn off.  Everyone has insecurities, but dating an insecure man makes me feel like the guy in the relationship.  I like when someone is confident in who they are and what their value is without needing constant reassurance.

Great Sense of Humor--What can I say, I am a goofball.  There are times to be serious and the rest of the time I would like to spend laughing.

Physical Attraction--I know this sounds terrible, but I have tried dating men who look great on paper and fulfill every other non-negotiable of mine.  The demise of those relationships has been because I am not physically attracted to them.  I'm not saying that they were unattractive, but I was just not feeling it.  It made me feel shallow at first including this, but I had to honest with myself that it will not work out if that one is not there. 

-Dating without a concrete idea of what type of person you are searching for is like impulse shopping at the grocery store without a list. You might end up with a lot of fun things in your cart but once you get home, you realize you forgot the essentials. 
-Be proactive and clear about the non-negotiable issues in order to maximize the effectiveness of and minimize the wasted time spent in the process of dating.

My 5 Dating Negotiables 
(I just did this to be silly--I know this guy doesn't exist--that's why they are called negotiables)

Loves Penguins as much as I do--If not, then he at least supports my love for penguins.

Quotes The Office frequently--He will have to in order to communicate with me.

Enjoys my Blog posts/Raps--if not, they will likely inspire one or more.

Karaokes with me--I would love to do a duet with someone who is not tone deaf and also not afraid to look like a fool.

Obsessed with giving Massages--I should specify that they are good massages...a girl can dream right?

If I could add a 6th Negotiable it'd be: Does a killer Blue Steel look.

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