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Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Timing Isn't Everything...The Transition Person

It's the right person, but the timing is off.  The timing is right, but there's something missing with that person.  Wrong time, right person, wrong fit, right time, wrong person...When does it all align?

As a currently single chick, I can't say I know exactly what the answer is--and to be honest I don't think really anyone can speak for everyone.  As an intelligent human being though I guess it depends on a number of variables(maturity, emotional availability, security, etc.).  One variable which I'm going to focus on in this post is timing--even more specifically--becoming involved with someone fresh out of a relationship. 

"There’s an element of this situation that’s down to bad timing, but to blame it mostly on timing is to miss some glaring problems. Don’t get things twisted – they’re not under different circumstances and you’ve missed the one piece of information that deals a crushing blow to anything you have in mind - they’re not over their ex. It doesn’t matter whether it’s that they’re scared shitless of commitment or intimacy or whether they’re moping after their ex or creeping around behind your back having talks with them; they’re unavailable."  Baggage Reclaim

Don't be the buffer in their transition from break-up confusion to singledom or even worse, their next relationship.  I know they might say "you're not a rebound" or "I'm over them."  That doesn't mean it's the truth.  Sometimes, they're so confused they don't even know what they're feeling--and other times they're intentionally/unintentionally selfish and only thinking of themselves.  It's up to you to break it off.  Click here for my post on Fear of Committment!

"Unfortunately, we need time to process and heal to be truly available and when we don't, we use other people as emotional airbags." Baggage Reclaim

With all of that said, I will say that there are always exceptions.  Furthermore, the romantic in me (that very small part) thinks that if it's the right person, timing won't matter.  I didn't say it was the rational part in me. Click here for my post on Rom-Coms Giving Unrealistic Expectations!

I won't say who/what inspired this because often times my posts are based on my random thoughts or stories I hear from friends.  I won't lie though--the ones that are most personal to me are the hardest for me to write and also probably the least witty.  So take a guess which category this one fits under...Dun dun dun. ;)


  1. Yikes, sounds like a horrible guy.....probably should have put out, maybe he would have gottrn over her quicker. Best of luck to you crazy!

  2. I moderate my comments so I debated allowing this one to be published. After thinking about it, I thought it would be a great reminder to everyone about the stupidity of certain people. I protect people's identities even though some posts are based on experiences I've had with specific individuals. After brief investigation, I figured out that this comment is from the "friend" of the guy who this post is inspired by. Clearly I'm better off not dating someone like that. I'm not about to change my morals to help someone get over an ex. Have fun with your easy girls.


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