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Monday, October 8, 2012

Ten Rules for Avoiding Intimacy (I found this in my High School Blog)

No joke...I happened to stumble upon my high school blog--which only a select number of people even knew it existed (and I plan to keep it that way).  The 17 year old me inspired 25 year old me.  

A quote from my HS blog post:
Obviously this is not realistic. Its just funny because a lot of them actually apply to some people. (It must be something of my mom's but I thought it was funny)

10 Rules for Avoiding Intimacy

1. Don't Talk--Basic rule for avoiding intimacy. If you have to talk, don't talk about anything meaningful. Talk about things like the stock market, the weather, school--anything but feelings.

2. Never Show Your Feelings--Showing your feelings is almost as bad as talking because feelings are ways of communicating. The best thing to do is to remain expressionless. 

3. Always Be Pleasant--Always smile and be friendly even when something is bothering you. You'll be surprised at how this will prevent you from being intimate.

4. Always Win--Never compromise even if their point of view may be as good as yours. If you start compromising it may be a sign that you care about their feelings.

5. Always Keep Busy--If you keep busy at school or work you won't have to be around them. This method is especially effective because you can make them feel unimportant in your life without even talking!

6. Always Be Right--There is nothing worse than being wrong because it is an indication that you are human. If you admit you are wrong you may have to admit they are right and that will make them as good as you. If they are as good as you then you might have to start taking them into consideration.

7. Never Argue--If you argue, you may begin to realize you two are different. If you are different you may have to talk about the differences to make adjustments, and if u make adjustments you may have to tell them who you really are and what you really feel. 

8. Make Them Guess What You Want--Never tell them what you want. This way if they guess and they are wrong, then they really don't understand or love you. If they did love you, they would already know what you want without asking.

9. Always Look Out for Number One--Remember, you are number one. All relationships exist in order to fulfill your needs and no one else's. If they cannot satisfy your needs they are narcissistic, after all, YOU are the one making the sacrifices in the relationship.

10. Keep the Television On--Keep the television on at all times. It keeps you from having to communicate. And you are trying to avoid all communication so this works well.

--These cracked me up.  Thanks mom for sending me this in a chain email when I was 17 years old.

1 comment:

  1. This is great advice! I do all these things (except the TV thing) and I'm blissfully free of female interference in my life. I highly recommend avoiding intimacy at all costs.


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